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birthday babies!

oh, what to say, what to say?

two years old.  TWO.

trista gracie.  you're a little meanie.  trying to run the house & all.  or at least the twinnie department.  you're got more language than your brother (and rolls, too!) but you are definitely a homebody who loves her family best of all.  most interaction between you and not-family-members occurs when you wave goodbye.  you love boo-boo bunnies, blankets and biting (!!!).

toby-sam.  my timid toby.  you like to be brave but some things are just too much.  and that's ok.  you're taller than your sister, trying to catch up with word counts, and more willing to offer a smile to others.  you love food, the four-wheeler and jumping-jumping-jumping.

what did i do without you?  something i never would have expected has become somethingS i could never live without.  listening to you two jabbering to each other through the monitor in the early morning hours is such a sweet sound.  being growled at by a tobe-a-saurus rex as i walk into your room.  and tris requiring her blanket to come with her as she is picked up.  sometimes you'll deign to allow auri to get your out of your beds.  and then the three of you will come barreling into the bedroom, happy to see the morning.  and it makes my heart overflow to see you.

i hope that you'll grow to be sweet.  and to love like i love you.  even better, like God loves you.  without reservation, without strings, without requirement.  that your more-often-than-not snack sharing and taking care of each other will grow with you and extend to others as well.  i want you to enjoy each other's company through adolescence and beyond.  twins, you are.  twins, you'll be forever.  something that no one else in this family can claim.  something special.  and i am oh, so glad, that you are MY somethings special.

i love you babies.  forever and always.


september cheating

September 1, 11:50am  Funny how your view of things changes as time goes by. Today I am SUPER proud of myself for getting auri to the off post dr. on time this morning, with the twins in tow & no help. Toby let everyone know how mad he was that it was hot in there but no one was harmed $ no international incidents were caused.

August cheating

so what if it's almost a year late.  life is busy.

(during toby's hospital stay)
August 5, 8:33pm Needs a sign on the door-BEWARE, nursing me-gook inside. Except in Korean. Sorry, little Korean kid who had the wrong room!

August 6, 3:46am  Oh look. It's 3:45 AM & everyone is awake! Any suggestions on how to keep two 4 month olds quiet so as to avoid another visit from staring adjeema? Ugh

August 6, 9:29pm Dear hospital-you only have to put up with us for (hopefully) 2 more nights. You've already completely destroyed my babies' abilities to sleep for more than 13.7 minutes at a time. Can we please just leave it at that? K thanks.

August 7, 7:50pm  Preliminary viewing of CT scan looks good. Definitive answer in the morning when neurology professor looks at it. Hoping to be out of here around lunchtime!

August 8, 1:06pm  We are home! Hooray!

August 11, 10:23am  making word family eggs with auri (Terra!) Tyler wants to know how come i never made her any when she was little. sorry, kid, you were born in the stone age when there was no such thing as facebook or pinterest!

August 13, 12:03am  happy birthday to Tyler Alyssa! 15 years ago today, you were the one who made me a mama! love you

August 14, 12:03am  Happy 16th birthday to the one who made me a mommy of two the easy way-with no labor pains! Love you, Alex Collette!

August 16, 11:03am  auri was getting ready to go to an activity with the neighbors. i asked her what she wanted done with her hair. she informed me that she wanted a "spanish braid" (french braid but with one older sibling taking spanish & the other taking french, can you blame her for getting mixed up?). love her!

August 19, 12:08pm  so it was a good morning. there was actually sleeping in my house last night, cinnamon rolls for breakfast, babies were happy, little dingbat wiener didn't make a mess, impromptu science lesson involving a butterfly...and then i caught the 4-year-old making dog food soup in the bathroom sink. every day is a new adventure!

August 21, 2:12pm  I'm having "one of those days" that started at 7 this morning. it is now after 2. how long are these things supposed to last? also, does anyone have any earplugs? this day is involving lots of crying. i think i'm next.

August 21, 10:32pm  tomorrow is "torture toby" day...aka (hopefully) final follow-up CT scan. say a prayer that we all make it through intact and with a good report.

August 22, 3:10pm  hooray hooray! it was NOT "torture toby" day! dr. decided he didn't need another CT scan based on how he is behaving. they said to call them if we need them. Lord willing, we WON'T! PTL for a healthy little guy! :)

August 25, 5:14pm  oh crap. tris is scooting 6 inches at a time to go after toys. anybody got a cage? for me, i mean.

August 27, 3:27pm  oh, yeah, trista's mobile. video to come later once Larry Collette makes it. greeeeeaaaat. anyone find me a cage yet?

August 29, 7:39am  big kid school starts today. how is it that i have two 10th graders?

August 30, 5:49pm  toby's mission today seems to be to catch up to trista in the mobility department. why is it every time Larry leaves, a baby gains mobility? someone is conspiring to make me crazy!

August 31, 12:27am  everyone in the house is sleeping. except me & squishy. i thought being mobile was supposed to help babies sleep better? apparently she didn't get the memo. she's wide awake on the floor trying to eat my toe. :-/

happy half-birthday! (sort of)

sort of b/c it is in the land where we came from & hope to soon return to (OMG SOON PLEASE ahem), but isn't anymore over here. my internet hates me. and work called before pleasure but since my internet hates me, work took longer than it should. that and those babies decided to celebrate half-year-hood by taking 3 HOURS to go to bed. i'm on my 2nd glass of wine. and?

tris is a teeny-tiny thing. i'm worried about what they will say at the doctor as it doesn't seem she's gained much weight. she does seem chubbier but she still seems a light little thing. she will only chew on a bottle for .2 seconds before spitting it out & will take maybe 5 tiny spoonfuls of cereal before trying to run off. and at least half of that cereal ends up on her face, bib, hand or, of late as she's learned to SPIT, on me. nice. not awesome, trista.

she's been mobile for awhile now, with her little soldier crawl. she's getting better at it and can climb into a lap at will, if only to lie there like a little beached whale squawking because she can't get any further on top of the owner of the lap (usually me). she's found her voice in the past week and loves to tell a story, complete with facial expressions.

she can't stand to be confined in a bouncer or stroller. we borrowed the neighbor's double jogger so as to try to keep up with a running routine while L was off in greener pastures, getting someone married & straightening out some house business & not changing diapers, and tris-dini managed to escape a 5-point harness to come shooting out the back of the stroller & end up on the sidewalk wondering what the hell had just happened.  no injury, apparently, but that put an end to our running routine.  i didn't feel like the neighbor would like super glue in her stroller.  crazy baby has even tried to drown herself in the sink by tipping the bath seat over & heading head first into the water.  wonder if she'll be the one keeping us in the emergency room?

toby-sam has fully recovered from his accident.  and now he has a cold.  poor fella can't catch a break.  he's bigger than trista.  he LOVES to eat & will take all the cereal he is offered.  he'll sometimes even take a bottle.  he's longer & heavier than she is-i'm interested to see those numbers at the dr.  he seems like he's about out of 3 month sleepers.  but he's still only big enough around for 3 month pants.  hopefully we move to warmer climes soon, as i'm afraid in order for his pants to fit his waist, he'll have to be faux-european with some man-capris.

he's decided as of today that turning over from back to front is a good skill to have.  he's not so much in the mobility department, as least not consistently.  he can turn a mean circle and has started pulling his legs up underneath him.  maybe he'll just go straight to a crawl?

he's already a talker.  which escalates to what i guess are dinosaur words.  we call him tobe-lociraptor.  he's so funny when he gets going.  he's more content than his sister is.  he'll deign to sit in a bouncer for cereal & will play in an exersaucer until he ends up with a dirty diaper and then he's MAD.  but where she wakes up in a pissy mood nearly every day, he wakes up with a smile.  he doesn't like a stroller but if he's being held, he's good until he's hungry.

when the circus leaves the house, we go with the moby & the ergo.  tris is usually on the front-just not quite tall enough to ride the back ergo yet.  toby is just barely there.  he rides but he can't see much.  he's generally content & we made it to the grocery store the other day with no major calamities.  and to MOPS this morning with minimal help into the church.  i'm supposed to be "bold" and ask for help but i would rather reserve my help call for a time when i really need it.  otherwise, it may be difficult but we'll sort it out.

it's been a speedy 6 months.  it felt like nothing when it the midsts of it but now that it's over, i wonder where it has gone? 

i do love my little babies & am ever so thankful for their big siblings and all the help they've been.  5 kids.  who knew?

july cheating

July 1 1:53pm is wondering if it is possible for excessive amounts of screaming to jar something loose in one's head.

July 4 11:45am  https://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=10150247726494901&comments

July 5 11:14pm   not a bad anniversary day! started with a squishy who slept from 10:30pm-5:45am & ended with the SUPER DUPER Alex Ray Collette & Tyler Coaxum wrangling all 3 little kids so Larry Collette & i could go out for a crybaby-free dinner! i ♥ my family! what a great day

July 9 9:56am Today Toby giggled & Trista escaped the bouncer strap completely. Larry missed the giggling but discovered the Houdini move before Houdini-ette landed on her little head.

July 11 5:36pm Baby appts today! tobes is 8'14", 22 1/4 inches. tris is 9'2", 21 1/2 inches. funny how at 4 months, trista is the same size her big brother was when he was born. they are healthy & the dr. pronounced them beautiful! but we knew that already. :)


July 14 6:28pm  received baby passports & birth certificates today. they are now official US citizens. now someone please buy me a winning lottery ticket so i can get the heck out of this wet country & away from the crazy landlady. please and thank you.

July 17 9:31pm must remember that just because i have three things on my to-do list, doesn't mean that even one will get done.

July 18 9:05am dear trista-i know you love your super duper rolling skill. and it's pretty impressive. however, (you may not have noticed this) you sleep better on your belly. so how's about we save the rolling for the daylight hours? thanks!

July 18 4:43pm More shots for babies today. :(. At least now we're done til 6 months.

July 19 11:54pm hmm...it's a toss up. we've got the 1 baby who goes down early & alone & wakes up 3 hours later to eat. and then we've got the other baby who goes down late & only with nursing but stays asleep for about 7 hours. i guess i'm just destined to have someone attached to/sleeping with/nursing on me for the next couple of years. i think i'm ok with that. ♥

July 21 12:58am thanks, big jerk weiner dog, for waking up a baby. all that ridiculous hacking for nothing? it's a good thing you have no meat on you or i would have sold you in the morning!

July 21 10:34pm 10pm & guess who's still up? crazy squishy baby. so much for baking tea cakes tonight. :-/

July 22 8:55pm is getting really frustrated with always feeling like I've accomplished nothing all day. :-/

July 28 1:35pm and trista's a giggler now. actually as of yesterday. just didn't get around to posting it. :)

July 30 10:31pm dear trista: we have nothing planned this evening except a grocery list & numerous episodes of extreme couponing with a little bit of big brother catching up thrown in. there. now that i've assured you that you won't be missing anything, you may go to sleep! please! pretty please? pretty please with a clean diaper thrown in? SIGH.


june cheating

June 2 9:53am dear toby sam-i get it...you figured out how your hands work & you are SO excited that they are so good at grasping things. however, grasping mommy's shirt & yanking down continuously while nursing is a good way to insure that there is no longer any nursing as your mommy will probably keel over from asphyxiation. just a thought-maybe you should pull on your own shirt instead? love-(gasp choke wheeze)-mommy

June 2 9:58pm can it be? can i actually have given birth to children that can put themselves to sleep without nursing, butt patting, rocking or singing? look out, friends, the world is going to end sometime soon!

June 7 3:36pm Woe befall the next person who rings my doorbell despite the sign in 2 languages telling them not to. If it's you, you will be handed the 2 screaming babies you probably woke up with the doorbell. And then I'll stand there & watch you juggle. Consider yourself warned. And pass it on.

June 8 12:00am Thinks that absolutely nothing is cuter than Trista grinning at herself in the mirror. Until I can get Toby to do it. Then it'll be a tie for cutest thing ever. Until next week at least. :)

June 11 2:30am My non-sleeping little Squishy just did a 5 hour stretch! Way to go, Trissy-tris!

June 16 3:53pm so...trista has started rolling-all around. i had to put her on the floor out of the pen while changing toby b/c she kept rolling over him! and then she rolled right off the floor mat. i think i will need some velcro-i'm not ready for this traveling mess!

June 17 5:58am 5am-Tris's onesie is wet. Changing her wakes up Toby who also needs changed & promptly pees all over everything when his diaper comes off. Trista rolls in it, necessitating another jammie change. And now I'm wide awake. It's a conspiracy for sure.

June 22 11:24am Fixing to brave the commissary with 4 of the 5 kids. Pray for me.

June 26 12:26am scared to go to bed...squishy has been asleep for almost SIX HOURS now. i have a feeling i know what is going to happen the minute i step foot in that room. :/

June 27 10:58am bad mommy moment last night...baby monitor on the fritz means toby sam was screaming in his bed for who knows how long. now it's a freak out every time i try to put him down. :(



May 3 12:03pm Thanks everyone for all the birthday wishes! My mama baked me a cake & watched the cry babies so Larry and I could go out to dinner. It was a good day!


May 4 6:31pm  i just printed out my mama's plane ticket. :(

May 5 8:56am 1st day alone all day with the littles. auri is asthma coughing despite a nebulizer treatment & toby just stopped screaming after 15 minutes. oh. dear.

May 5 10:30pm we seem to have survived the first day! thanks Larry Collette for bringing THAT auri to the dr. (seems to be feeling better) & Jessica McLemore Asher for holding THAT tobias & patting him to sleep. whew. 2 cups of coffee & a cup of wine (we're so classy) & i think i'll live to fight another day

May 7 8:15pm triste y cansada. not the best day. :(

May 9 11:47am I think it's safe to say that today is just following in the weekend's footsteps. It's so bad that auri put herself back to bed 2 hours after breakfast. On another note-happy 8 weeks, babies!

May 10 6:08pm has decided that Tyler Coaxum will no longer be attending school, on account of the fact that THOSE babies screamed all day & when the biggest sister came home? they settled down. maybe I'LL go to school & leave her home with them. sheesh. very thankful to have her right now!

May 11 10:52am Laying on the couch under a pile of sleeping (NOT screaming!) babies. Are there other things I should be doing? Yes. Are there other things I'd rather be doing? No way in the world. :)

May 13 3:15pm Toby Sam's hair is looking pretty RED these days! Hmmm...did grandma call it?


May 14 12:17pm  twinnies are 2 months old today! hear that racket? we're all crying. twinnies because, well, that's what they do. me because TWO MONTHS already? wahhhhh

May 15 2:56pm it seems both babies are asleep. neither on me. i'm not sure what to do with myself here. perhaps i should find my camera?

May 16 12:00pm babies had 2 month appointment today. they both weigh 7.5 pounds! but apparently gaining 2-2.5 pounds in 6 weeks just isn't enough for the army. ugh. and shots have been postponed until the pedi comes back from paternity leave (if our names ever get to the top of the wait list).

May 18 10:06am i think toby has slept for 5 minutes in the past 15 hours. and that was in the past 10 minutes. please, child, go.to.sleep.

May 18 11:57pm Very thankful for a husband able to come home from work early to make us lunch & put me to bed, a meal delivered on just the right day & friends to sit outside with & (hopefully) tire the babies out with fresh air so we can have a better night tonight.

May 19 8:32am thank you, babies, for a better night's sleep! hooray!

May 19 10:25am And Toby Sam has joined the "social smile" club! Take THAT, army! Love the gummy smiles!

May 20 6:24am Got all excited upon waking up & realizing it had been 4 hours since I nursed anyone. And then someone yarfed down my neck. well good morning to you, too! How does one go back to sleep after that?

May 23 1:03pm holy crybaby day! who told the babies that it's monday?

May 24 2:15pm bad day-babies made it to the top of the wait list & the pedi was back so they got shots. :( also, SOMEONE in the neighborhood (not mentioning any names Dan Asher & Jessica McLemore Asher) has moving trucks at their house. AND i'm out of chocolate. i don't want a do-over...i want a skip.

May 25 12:29pm poor babies feel yucky today. :(

May 27 11:16am auri (in the kitchen with a mouthful of waffle): "i -mumble mumble- butt -mumble mumble- to Jesus!"
me (in the laundry room with the washer running & a soundtrack of crying babies): "what! you showed your butt to Jesus? what?!?"
auri: "no! i showed my LOVE to Jesus!"
me: "oh. phew. that's good!"

May 30 12:12am impromptu cookout tonight (is it still a cookout if most of the food was carryout?), pancake byob (bring your own batter) in the morning, cookout tomorrow afternoon (with the "cake-taker" full of homemade sangria that is in my fridge!). whoo hoo for memorial day weekend! and babies who have been 1/3 less screamy!


Cheating again....(late april version)

April 20 1:32pm dear babies: it would be great if, instead of cat nap tag-teaming, you would both sleep more than 15 minutes at a time at the same time. love, your hungry mama. (remember-if i don't eat, neither can you! just sayin'...)

April 20 10:17pm and now trista has figured out how to roll over. toby has almost perfected it. i am in so much trouble

April 22 2:02pm trying coffee again today. if you hear LOTS of LOUD screaming coming from my house tonight, you'll know it wasn't a success. pray for no screaming.

April 25 12:37pm tobias. it's called a nap. it's free. take one!

April 27 7:21pm home alone with babies for the evening. didn't think they'd care too much for the cirque show. :)

April 28 7:25pm Tobes is having a really bad day. Poor fella. I wish I knew how to fix it! =(

April 29 10:09am tobes seems to be feeling better today-now tris is out of sorts. good grief.

April 29 10:03pm looks like my job this weekend is to clear the newborn clothes out of the drawers. BOTH babies in size 1 diapers & 0-3 month clothing. :( that was too fast.


remember me?

maybe not since it's been months since i've been here.  sigh.  i always promise to do better but it never pans out. 

so, babies are almost 5.5 months old.  and they are still babies.  and cry babies.  and little babies.  but also cereal eating babies.  and smiley babies.  and rolly polly moley babies.  GT rolls all around & has started scooting at times to get what she wants.  BT is proficient at front to back & has recently started acting as if maybe he'll be back to front very soon. 

we still don't go out very much.  it's difficult enough with L and horrifically impossible alone & pretty stressful with teenage helpers in tow.  because i have babies that like their mama.  and hate their stroller & car seats.  and have you ever tried to grocery shop with no hands?  because when holding 2 babies, that's what you have-no hands.  not too long ago i could wrap one & football carry the other but they've gotten a bit bigger so while the wrap strategy still works, the football carry doesn't & they both demand to be carried & it is just a mess all around.  we like to stay home anyway.  much more comfortable for everyone involved.  besides, this is what happens when we go places:

8:20 am-leave the house for a steering team meeting 30 minutes away.  some babies cried most of the way.  you know who you are.  make it with 5 minutes to spare.  drop all 3 littles & 1 big off in childcare (not that the big needs childcare but maybe the childcare needed some help & since the big is a little bit grounded right now, then that's where the help was coming from).  2 littles stayed in childcare the whole time (1 took a nap!!!!) & the other little came to eat, hang out with ms. K, eat some more, make a yuck diaper & then get a ride back to childcare where he stayed the rest of the time.  i was suitably impressed.
11:15isham-leave the meeting for home.  some babies cried most of the way.  not naming any names.
11:45isham-reach home.  one baby sleeping.  other baby needs to eat.  nurse baby while standing in the garage waiting for other baby to wake up.  other baby wakes up while 1st baby is nursing.  big takes baby upstairs.  babies cry while everyone tries to rush to eat lunch.
12:45ishpm-pack everyone back in the van for a clinic visit for a baby who has a rash.  takes 25 minutes to make a 10 minute drive.  grr.
1:10pm-appointment.  PA hands me a piece of paper to fill out.  cause i totally have a hand to fill it out with or something.  see dr.  get prescribed new cream for persistant rash.  discuss the fact that baby is still little.  I'M TRYING OK.  I DON'T SEE YOU DRINKING THAT NASTY ASS FORMULA.  OK.  keep trying.  ok.  wait at pharmacy for cream.  must ask dr. a question.  get cream.  have to go turn in paper at front desk.  wait 15 minutes in line.  turn in paper.  try to schedule next appointment.  last appointment, was told they schedule 28 days out.  apparently they've changed their mind.  now they schedule 7 days out.  wtf?  please someone teleport me back to the states now.  i need something that makes sense. 

this is why we stay home.  less germs, less crying, less stupidity. 

anyway, i may well lose my mind over the next 3 weeks as SOMEONE is going on vacation & leaving me all alone, i am.  and the big kids start school on monday & for some strange reason, i told the middle kid that we would start her school on monday & the little kids still don't sleep for crap at night & like to nurse all day & someone will have to do laundry & make dinners & generally make sure we're all still intact on september...uh...september somethingth when L comes back from his vacation (which he truthfully has well earned but i'm still completely freaked out by going this alone).  and then scant weeks later, an uncle will be coming to visit.  not real sure what we'll do with him but i'm sure we can figure something out.  there may be an uncle & big kid trip in the mix.  who needs school when there's an uncle to play with?  we're not telling them that yet though. 

and a BT is awake from a nap.  and probably would like to eat.  because that's what he does.  must go oblige.


almost, not quite

it's late here.  later than i should be up on account of early rising babies & a meeting 1/2 an hour away that starts at 9 tomorrow morning.  that i'm planning on attending.  with babies.  without grandma.  yikes.  anyway.

i'm writing long overdue thank you notes with a GT in tow.  BT is on his daddy's chest on the couch.  GT has eaten & was rolling around on my lap.  because, although she's pudging out nicely (i did that!  hey!  I DID THAT!), she's still small enough to do that.  and i picked her up because she was threatening to roll off onto the floor.  and the biggest burp ever came out of the little baby ever.  and it was funny.  and then we were face-to-face and i talked to her & smiled at her.  we've been trying to get these babies to smile at us on purpose but had no success. 

AND GT SMILED!  and i was so excited!  because she smiled!  at me!  AT ME!  at me, her mommy!  whee!  yay!  and then i noticed she was doing crazy eyes...which she does before falling asleep.  and, alas, i realized...she wasn't smiling at me.  not on purpose, at least.  she was playing with the angels.  guess i have to wait a little bit longer.  it was a nice thought while it lasted, though!

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March 2013